Hi reader!

My computer's finished. It's slowly dying from this sickness and I don't have any medication for it. Luckily, my mom has an external hard drive, so I'm going to save all of my most important things! (like a few kbs of writing and 20 gigs of music) And then I'm going to do a total reboot. Computer shall be reborn anew! (I'm actually excited about it. Think of all the space I'll free up!)

Well for some reason, I always hate my old poetry. There's just something about it that seems so juvenile and I just don't like to revisit it, not even to edit. However, I remember the way I felt when writing each little snippet of poetry, and sometimes, there would be a gemstone in the pile of crap. So as I sift through writing and decide which pieces to keep and which to throw out, I thought I might share some excerpts from pieces I will be archiving, but probably won't look at again. It seems I've been a bleeding heart liberal since age 11, but I just didn't know it. Interesting... Also, keep in mind that I had my wild adolescent years earlier than most. I'm a lot more mellowed out now that I'm more comfortable with myself and the hormones aren't running crazy.
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"Is not the nature of nature
To forge onward against the wind
In a desperate attempt to create something perfect?

I should think it is-
That's the cruel beauty of evolution.
Or unholy propaganda, as might it be labeled by
sweet bloodthirsty religion."
---
"You wish we had our constellation
We named it after beautiful
Things we missed
From homes beside the sea.
You forgot the wind that
Blew sand into your eyes
And made you cry
When the emotion had dried up."
---
"The rope knots you tied me with
Have long since been eaten by fish.

And only the rings in my bones
Can tell me just
How long it's been since

I forgot your name."
---
"Climb the white, naked trees-
The ones with the wilted black flowers
That once bore fruit.
That we used to climb
As children; as orphans."
---
"And from strangers,
I have learned to pray.
I have learned to smile.

From strangers,
I have learned to hope for better things."
---
"If you had wings
And your secrets were stained into the road
Would you walk down it or fly away?

I was walking down old tracks
Passing each imperfect bar, each steel beam
And then the train came
Crushed my body beneath its churning wheels
Five feet from my station.
From my final destination."
---
"Wine and dim lanterns
My lost home.
Broken piano keys and yellowed walls
My lost memories.
Sunlit cliffs and wooden frames.
My lost dreams.
Faded secrets and flashing eyes
My lost innocence.
Flickering streetlights and a broken heart
I am lost."
---
"The cold chamomile and electric scream"
---
"Strange and beautiful thoughts of
Clouds and
Summerbirds
Can't hang on to them
The wild things that flit in the cold air
Wish I could grow something
More golden more pure
Perfect"
---
"She sweeps in through the doorway
In a black-stained satin dress,
And smiles on a winter day
Pale sadness to repress.
But rosy dreams and honeyed laughs
All fade out one by one,
She drops her head in darkened shame--
To you, she points the gun."
---
"Shall I play the piano
And paint the walls orange to show
I'm vivid and alive?"
---
"My hands delved into this aging soil
And held softly whispered life
When this soul was dry and old with time.
Then blossoms sprouted from my fingertips."
---
出生以前凤凰烧毁
百蜂鸟飞行从骨灰
"My phoenix burned before it was born
And hummingbirds flew from the ashes."
---
"I don't know where hope buried itself
Or why it keeps hiding"
---
"He can't dream of candid thoughts
Or think of candid dreams
He doesn't write healer's stories
Or fix his broken bones
He doesn't walk over water
Or swim in the sand."
---
"A Revelation was sewn before
A Genesis was threaded.

An end came and went
Before a beginning was ever known.

But there is still time."
---
"Fly to places new and green, exotic and far
Where birds can sing the sweetest songs and nest beneath the stars.
Where church steeples pierce the mist, and temples light the mountain."
---
"My eyes have yet to be scarred,
Only opened to white orchids
And angels dressed in silk."
---

And that's it! So my Thanksgiving was nice. Chatted for a good two hours with my family. They were well behaved, so I was happy. How was everyone else's thanksgiving!?

PS- I'm sorry for being unresponsive lately. I haven't been able to view the 150 deviations waiting for me at the moment, but I promise that whenever I get my computer restored, (I really don't know how long the process takes but I'm beginning ASAP) I'll be sure to view each of them individually!